


The Process of Love

by angelofthequeers



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Episode: s05e03 Free to Be You and Me, Hand Jobs, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Not My Fault, Romance, Shameless Smut, Sorry Not Sorry, There Goes My Innocence, i blame my friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-14
Updated: 2015-09-15
Packaged: 2018-04-20 19:05:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4798919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelofthequeers/pseuds/angelofthequeers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are four steps to sex: before, the build-up, during the act and after, relaxing in the afterglow. Dean's about to discover just how hard these steps can be when it comes to his angel...</p><p>I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION TO REPOST MY WORKS ELSEWHERE. PLEASE RESPECT MY WISHES OR I WILL TAKE ACTION.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Before

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LokiNeedsHugs1031](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LokiNeedsHugs1031/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I don’t own SPN.
> 
> This is an idea that I came up with while talking to my best friend, LokiNeedsHugs1031 (who I will now call Loki). So this story is dedicated to her!

_Before_

Dean didn’t know when the hell he’d started wanting to kiss Castiel. All he knew was that it freaked him out because wasn’t he meant to dislike him? Sure, the angel had rebelled against Heaven and switched to their side but he _had_ treated Dean pretty fucking awfully at first (even if Dean had been the only one he’d entrusted with his most inner doubts and thoughts) and he _had_ played a pretty big role in allowing the Apocalypse to even happen by letting Sam go to kill Lilith. But then again, Dean couldn’t talk. He’d been the weak son of a bitch who’d broken in Hell after thirty years and spilt blood, allowing the whole fucking thing to happen in the first place.

So that line of thought was out. Dean’s next argument was that Castiel was a robot angel who’d hated him only months ago. Angels didn’t even feel emotions (apart from anger, self-righteousness and sheer fucking arrogance), so how the hell could Castiel possibly like him? And, even with the _slim_ chance that Castiel _did_ like him back, how could they even be together? Castiel was an angel – he wasn’t bound to Earth like Dean was, so what was making him stay apart from his rebellion? And wasn’t there something about angels not being allowed to fall in love with humans? After everything Castiel had turned his back on (and his entitled outburst the other day had reminded Dean very harshly of that), Dean wasn’t about to corrupt the ‘precious little angel’ even more.

So he had to settle for crushing hard on the infuriating angel from afar. And he _hated_ it.

Another thing he hated was how Castiel arrived so fucking _silently_! While cleaning his jacket in his motel room after hacking a vampire’s head off, Dean was overcome by the sudden feeling of being watched and when he looked up into the mirror, he jumped.

“God!” he cursed at the reflection of Castiel. “Don’t do that!”

“Hello, Dean.” Dean didn’t want to admit it but the way Castiel said those two words in his deep, gravelly voice always sent shivers down his spine (and further south, though that was something he _really_ didn’t want to think about). Instead, he turned around but this just made it even worse as it brought him right up in Castiel’s face.

“Cas,” he murmured, trying to look anywhere but Castiel’s chapped lips. “We’ve talked about this. Personal space?”

“My apologies.” Castiel stepped back, leaving Dean with a sinking feeling of disappointment in his stomach. To distract himself, he grabbed his jacket and walked towards the bed.

“How’d you find me?” he asked. “I thought I was flying below the angel radar.”

He rubbed his ribs. He felt a flicker of hope when Castiel’s bright blue eyes fixed on his chest for a few moments before he looked away.

 _‘He was probably just thinking about the carvings on my ribs,’_ Dean thought firmly. _‘Pull yourself together, Winchester!’_

“You are,” Castiel said. “Bobby told me where you were.”

After a few minutes of stilted conversation, Castiel finally got to what he wanted: Dean’s help in trapping an archangel.

“The one who killed me,” Castiel clarified.

“‘Scuse me?” Dean blinked. Even having died as many times as he had, that was still a sentence he was unused to anyone being able to say.

“His name is Raphael.”

“You were wasted by a teenage mutant ninja angel?” Dean said disbelievingly, resisting the urge to snicker. Castiel gave him a Look.

“I’ve heard whispers that he’s walking the earth,” he said. “This is a rare opportunity.”

“For what? Revenge?”

Castiel shook his head.

“Information.”

Trying to clear his head (from both this new development and the way he wanted to slam Castiel up against the wall and shove his tongue down the angel’s throat), Dean returned to the sink and started to wash his knife.

“So, what, you think you can find this dude and he’s just gonna spill God’s address?”

“Yes, because we are going to trap him and interrogate him.”

Dean paused and turned back to look at Castiel, whose back was turned.

“You’re serious about this?” he said. Castiel turned around and oh _yeah_ , he looked fucking serious.

“Yes.”

Dean raised his eyebrows and walked towards Castiel.

“So, what, I’m Thelma and you’re Louise and we’re just gonna hold hands and sail off this cliff together?”

His stomach twisted at the analogy but, thankfully and disappointingly, Castiel didn’t get the reference. Instead, he asked why the hell he should do this and Castiel’s response that he was simply insurance, because no angel would dare to harm Michael’s vessel, had him raising his eyebrows and trying to ignore that little voice that was gleefully whispering that Castiel only saw him as a tool, only valued him for what help he could provide, that the angel did not like him as anything more than an acquaintance.

“I need your help because you are the only one who’ll help me. Please.”

And with that plea, with those imploring blue eyes, Dean’s resolve utterly crumbled.

“Alright, fine. Where is he?”

After firmly telling Castiel that no, they were _not_ flying because that was so fucking uncomfortable, Dean sped towards Waterville, Maine, with Castiel in the front seat. It felt so strange to have Castiel in the front seat instead of Sam but, strangely, Dean found that he didn’t mind.

After what felt like the longest six and a half hours of Dean’s life (both because the silence was heavy and because he was constantly fighting the urge to pull over and make out passionately with Castiel), they finally pulled up in Waterville. Dean made a quick stop to change into his fed suit and then he pulled up outside the police station, shooting Castiel a curious look.

“And we’re here, why?” he said as they got out of the car.

“A deputy sheriff laid eyes on the archangel,” was Castiel’s response. Dean blinked.

“And he still has eyes?” he said. Castiel just stared at him, making Dean’s stomach do a flip-flop. “Alright, what’s the plan?”

“We’ll…tell the officer that he witnessed an angel of the Lord and the officer will tell us where the angel is,” Castiel said completely seriously. Dean had to resist the urge to grin.

“Seriously? You’re gonna walk in there and tell him the truth?”

“Why not?” God, Castiel’s innocence was so endearing!

“Because we’re humans.”

Dean pulled a fake ID out of his pocket and tucked it into Castiel’s trench coat. He then began to fix up Castiel’s shirt and tie, his hands trembling as he furiously fought the urge to grab that tie and pull the angel in for a searing kiss. This was driving him _nuts_!

“And when humans want something really, really bad, we lie,” he finished, nodding in satisfaction at his handiwork.

“Why?” Castiel said innocently. Dean raised his eyes from the angel’s lips but meeting those blue eyes just made it worse.

“Because that’s how you become president.”

Castiel all but killed Dean inside, first forgetting to flash his ID and then presenting it upside down. Dean turned it over for him, trying not to laugh, and then when Castiel obliviously started to talk about angels and demons, Dean quickly shut him down while trying not to jump the angel’s bones then and there. Why the hell was he unable to control himself around Castiel?

After learning that a nearby gas station had been completely levelled by an explosion and that one man had been in the middle of it but escaped unscathed, Dean and Castiel paid a visit to that man, who was residing in Saint Pete’s hospital close by. Dean successfully concealed his horror at the sight of the catatonic, drooling mess that was Donnie Fisherman and looked at Castiel.

“I take it that’s not Raphael anymore?” he said.

“Just an empty vessel,” Castiel confirmed. Dean took a breath.

“So this is what I’m looking at if Michael jumps my bones?”

“No, not at all.” Dean’s heart began to rise at Castiel’s words. “Michael is much more powerful. It’ll be far worse for you.”

And it promptly plummeted.

After finding an abandoned house in which to summon Raphael at sunrise, Castiel flapped off to fetch some holy oil from Jerusalem – apparently the angel equivalent to holy water once lit.

“Do we have any chance of surviving this?” Dean said, silently imploring Castiel to be honest.

“You do.”

“So odds are you’re a dead man tomorrow.” That thought did not make Dean happy.

“Yes.”

“Well. Last night on earth,” Dean said as Castiel sat down. “What’re your plans?” He felt a thrill go through him at the thought of him using his self-proclaimed best line on Castiel, though the angel couldn’t possibly know this.

“I just thought I’d sit here quietly,” Castiel said plainly. After a little digging, a stunned Dean found out that Castiel was a pure, unsullied little virgin, having never even done the dirty with a fellow angel before (and could angels even bang each other?).

“Let me tell you something,” Dean said, grabbing his jacket. “There are two things I know for certain. One, Bert and Ernie are gay.” Oh, why couldn’t Castiel pick up the hints? “Two, you are not gonna die a virgin. Not on my watch. Let’s go.”

Dean left, wishing so fucking hard that he was the one Castiel was going to lose his virginity to rather than some random prostitute. But as _if_ Castiel could possibly want to have sex with him!


	2. Build-up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own SPN.
> 
> I know, I know, I only posted chapter 1 like three hours ago. But hey, I stayed up till 2 am writing this fic so I play by MY rules!
> 
> Thanks to Loki for your comment :)

_Build-up_

The terrified look on Castiel’s face in the brothel was fucking hilarious and Dean found himself constantly taking a drink to avoid bursting into unsupportive laughter. The one rule of getting your virgin friend laid was that you were as supportive as possible and that did _not_ include laughing at them.

“Relax,” he said comfortingly.

“This is a den of iniquity!” Castiel hissed. “I should not be here!”

“Dude, you full-on rebelled against Heaven,” Dean snorted. “Iniquity is one of the perks.”

Deep down, Dean was hoping that nobody took an interest in Castiel. Maybe, just maybe, he’d be able to pluck up the courage to tell the angel just how he felt if that happened. And even if he didn’t, he wouldn’t have to put up with the constant heavy feeling of knowing that Castiel was no longer a virgin thanks to him. Why the hell had he done this? But, to his dismay, a hooker noticed and approached Castiel with a sultry smile.

“Showtime,” Dean sighed, taking a drink.

“Hi,” the hooker said with a wide smile, looking right at Castiel. “What’s your name?”

Castiel looked anywhere but the hooker. Dean found the angel absolutely hilarious.

“Cas,” he said finally, startling Castiel. “His name is Cas. What’s your name?”

“Chastity.” The hooker batted her eyelashes, while Castiel simply drained half his beer in one gulp. Dean wanted to die at the irony.

“Chastity?” he repeated. “Wow. Is that kismet or what, buddy?” He felt his heart sink at his next words. “Well, he likes you, you like him, so dayenu.”

“Come on, baby.” Chastity pulled Castiel up and Dean caught the angel as he passed to give him a wad of cash to pay Chastity with.

“If she asks for a credit card, no,” he instructed. “Now just stick to the basics, okay? Do not order off the menu. Go get her, tiger.”

Castiel didn’t move.

“Don’t make me push you,” Dean threatened. Castiel took the money and followed Chastity away, leaving Dean to look around and sidle in next to another hooker. What the hell. Castiel was obviously never going to bang him so he might as well have some fun while he could. The two of them were interrupted a little later by the sound of a bloodcurdling scream and Dean skidded into the back of the brothel to investigate.

“Get out of my face!” Chastity was shrieking at Castiel, throwing her shoe at him. Castiel’s hair was rumpled and his trench coat was half off and Dean immediately shoved down the urge to jump on the angel and rip his clothes all the way off. “Leave me alone! Bastard! Screw you, jerk! I’ll kill you!”

Chastity stormed down the hall, pausing to screech in Dean’s face. When she disappeared, Dean approached a confused Castiel.

“The hell did you do?” he said.

“I don’t know,” Castiel said innocently. “I just looked her in the eyes and told her it wasn’t her fault that her father Gene ran off. It was because he hated his job at the post office.”

Dean nearly burst out laughing then and there. Of _course_ this was something that Castiel would do! God, why did the angel have to be so fucking adorable?

“Oh, no, man!” Dean said, grinning.

“What?” Castiel blinked.

“This whole industry runs on absent fathers.” Dean was still grinning. “It’s – it’s the natural order.”

When he noticed two bouncers approaching them with Chastity in tow, Dean knew that they had to get out of there. He grabbed Castiel and pulled him towards the door at the end of the corridor, the two of them emerging into a dark alley. Once outside, Dean could no longer help himself and he burst into a fit of hysterical laughter, Castiel frowning at him.

“What’s so funny?” the oblivious angel said as Dean nearly hacked out a lung. He wanted to kiss Castiel then and there because _nobody_ could make him laugh that hard! Apart from Sam, but he hadn’t done so in years!

“Oh, nothing,” Dean wheezed as his laughter finally died down. “Woo! It’s been a long time since I’ve laughed that hard.” His face fell at the realisation. “It’s been more than a long time. Years.”

The drive back to the abandoned house was silent, though Dean couldn’t stop looking at Castiel and wishing more and more that he could just fucking tell Castiel how he felt and then move on to the hot sex. But he knew that would never happen.

“Is losing one’s virginity always that…eventful?” Castiel asked suddenly. Dean let out a snort.

“I’m pretty sure that’s just you, Cas,” he said. “My first time? Boring old sex in the chick’s bed. I don’t even remember her name.”

Castiel was looking at him oddly. Dean couldn’t tell if he was frowning or not.

“I s’pose I’m the poster boy for iniquity and lust, right?” he said with a dark chuckle. “I’ve slept with so many women and I don’t even remember most of them.”

“You are flawed, Dean,” Castiel said firmly. “But so is everybody else. And you have a lot of good qualities to make up for it.”

Dean snorted again, turning his eyes back to the road.

“I didn’t even want to have sex with Chastity. I had no interest in her whatsoever.”

“Dude, that’s pretty much the definition of hookers. They’re hot, you have fun, you pay them, you leave.”

“You misunderstand me, Dean. I had no interest in that prostitute at all – physical or otherwise.”

Dean raised his eyebrows.

“So, what, you bat for the same team then?” he said. Castiel took a moment to catch up.

“I have no preference. I am a genderless wavelength of celestial energy. You see me as male because I am using a male vessel. If Jimmy was female, you would think of me as female.”

Well, that didn’t help Dean at all because Castiel’s gender was not the problem. Dean had experimented enough to know that while he preferred chicks, he didn’t have an aversion to men by any means. The problem was that Castiel was an angel and there was a fat fucking chance of him even showing an interest in Dean anyway.

“And…she was not who I truly wanted to be with.”

Dean’s hands tightened around the steering wheel. Castiel was interested in someone? Who? Was it someone that Dean knew?

“Really?” he said lightly, forcing himself to grin. “Who’s the lucky son of a bitch, then?”

Castiel fixed Dean with an intense blue stare. His next four words floored Dean.

“I think you know.”

The Impala screeched to a halt on the side of the road. Dean stared at Castiel in utter shock, his mouth hanging slightly open and making him look like a brain-dead idiot.

“I – you – _what_?”

Castiel continued to stare at Dean and then those fucking plump lips of his twisted into a small smile that made Dean’s stomach twist in knots.

“How long?” Dean demanded.

“A while now,” Castiel confessed. “At first, I was confused. I had never felt like this before and I – I tried to sort out how I truly felt. And when my feelings did not go away, I realised…I realised that I was in love with you, Dean. And while that felt liberating, it also felt very constricting. Because I knew that you could never possibly love me back.”

Dean continued to stare at Castiel stupidly. The angel’s small smile began to fade and he looked out the window.

“I know that you feel no romantic attachment to me, Dean,” he said. “After we summon Raphael, I will resume my search for God. You won’t have to be uncomfortable around me any longer.”

“My God, Cas, will you just shut up?” Dean finally blurted out, his crush punching him in the gut and sending fire coursing through him. When Castiel gave him a hurt, wounded look, Dean realised that he’d probably sent the angel a completely wrong message.

“I apologise, Dean. Forget I ever said anything. I – mmph!”

He was cut off when Dean grabbed the lapels of his trench coat, pulled him close and smashed his lips against his. Castiel made a startled noise, frozen, and then he clutched at the back of Dean’s head and kissed back. Castiel was clearly inexperienced, as his angle was all wrong and his nose bumped against Dean’s and his teeth collided with Dean’s, but fuck, if that wasn’t the hottest thing in Dean’s life then he didn’t know what was!

“I said shut up,” Dean whispered when he finally pulled back for air. Castiel stared at him blankly, his eyes dilated and shining with confusion and wonder and lust, before gripping Dean’s face and kissing him again. Fire and electricity surged through Dean’s veins as Castiel clumsily kissed him and he felt his dick begin to swell in his jeans, pushing painfully against its cotton and denim prison. He pulled back for more air and managed to slightly push back the haze of lust and desire in his mind.

“Cas.” He gently pushed Castiel’s shoulder until the angel backed off, his dark hair in the sexiest sex ‘do Dean had ever seen and his eyes wide.

“Was that acceptable, Dean?” Castiel said breathlessly.

“Better,” Dean said.

“Can we resume our kissing?”

“‘Course, Cas. Hell, we can even go further if you want. Just – not here, ‘kay?”

Castiel frowned at him.

“We’re on the side of a road,” Dean reasoned, ignoring little Dean’s vehement protests. “Need a little more privacy. And I banged your sister in the back seat months ago, so I’d feel like a dick if I did it to you too.”

Heh. Dick. Dean was hilarious.

“Also…you deserve better, Cas. Anna was hot but she’s – she’s not you, man. You deserve better for your first time.”

Castiel was staring at Dean, his head tilted slightly. He then smiled – actually smiled – and Dean felt a brilliant heat begin to surge through him, pulsing in time with his heartbeat.

“Of course, Dean,” Castiel said. “Where did you have in mind?”

Dean’s mind went blank. Where were they supposed to do this? They didn’t have a motel room and they sure as hell weren’t doing it in that dusty old house!

“Uh…anywhere with a bed,” he finally said. “I’d say a motel room but we don’t have one.”

Castiel raised his eyebrows.

“Then we’ll have to get one,” he said primly. Dean laughed and nervously rubbed the back of his head.

“You sure, man?” he said. “I mean, this ritual’s gotta be performed by sunrise, right? We gotta get back there in time and we can’t miss it –”

“Dean,” Castiel interrupted. “My penis is quite erect, I am very aroused and if we do not have sex very soon then I will – what is the phrase? Ditch your ass and not return for a while.”

Dean stared at Castiel in shock before bursting into loud laughter, leaning over the steering wheel for support.

“T-Tell it like it is, Cas!” he choked.

“I already did, Dean,” Castiel frowned. “I don’t understand how I could possibly be any blunter than that.”

Dean just laughed harder. He waited until he finally had his laughter under control before wiping tears from his eyes and turning back to Castiel.

“How – how about we take Baby back to the house,” he suggested, “and then you zap us to some motel and we have fun till sunrise?”

Castiel nodded thoughtfully, a small smile touching his lips.

“That sounds like a wonderful plan, Dean.”


	3. During

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own SPN.
> 
> Thanks to LokiNeedsHugs1031 and Amelia_Pond for your comments :)

_During_

On the way back to the house, Dean made a quick stop at a small store to pick up some lube. He already had condoms because, well, you never know when you’re going to get some ass and it doesn’t hurt to be prepared. But he hadn’t had any use for lube in ages and so here he was, paying the smirking clerk and trying not to make a snappish remark.

 _‘Is this really happening?’_ he wondered with a thrill of excitement as he returned to the Impala, where Castiel was waiting patiently. _‘Am I really, finally gonna be able to bang Cas? Does Cas really love me back?’_

At the risk of sounding like a chick, Dean switched off his thoughts and slid into the driver’s seat. Castiel’s eyes zeroed in on the lube.

“Trust me, Cas, when you’re shoving your dick up someone’s ass, you definitely want lube,” Dean said. The thought of Castiel riding him, his blue eyes glazed and his mouth hanging open, immediately sent a jolt of blood surging down south and he forced himself to focus on anything else. Cute puppies, kittens, even the looming Apocalypse…anything that would allow him to focus on driving and not crashing before they got Baby safely back at the abandoned house.

“Is there anything else we require, Dean?” Castiel asked. Dean quickly ran through a mental checklist. Condoms? Check. Lube? Check. All they needed now was a bed.

“Nope,” Dean said. “Now let’s get back. The sooner we’re there, the sooner we can find a motel room and get it on.”

He pulled out of the park and sped back down the road.

“Dean?” Castiel said. “Is the lack of a bed the only thing prohibiting us from performing intercourse at the house?”

“Pretty much.” God, how Castiel’s bluntness turned Dean on! “I want your first time to be special, Cas, and you’re not doing it in the back seat of a car or on a dusty old floor.”

Castiel nodded thoughtfully and they lapsed into silence. It seemed like far too long – and little Dean agreed – before they arrived back at the house and Dean slid out of the Impala, feeling both excited and nervous as hell. How was this going to play out? Was Castiel going to take it? Or was he going to pin Dean and give it to him? The thought of the angel ordering him around and dominating over him turned Dean on far more than he was willing to admit and he completely missed the fact that Castiel was leading him to the house until the door shut behind them.

“Cas?” he said. “What –”

Before he could say anything more, Castiel had shoved him against the wall and firmly pressed his lips to Dean’s. Dean made a surprised sound but then kissed back, groaning when Castiel’s body pushed into his. Their crotches made brief contact and the sparks that jumped made Dean groan again loudly. His dick quickly swelled even faster at the low, surprised moan that Castiel made.

“Cas…” Dean forced out. “I thought – motel room –”

In response, Castiel gave a small wave of his hand. A loud thump made Dean jump and his mouth fell open when he saw the double bed behind Castiel, conspicuous simply because it was the only thing not covered in dust.

“Are there any more problems, Dean?” Castiel said, a small, smug smile crossing his mouth. To avoid bursting into laughter and ruining the mood, Dean chose to lean forward and capture Castiel’s plump lips with his own. The angel’s lips were every bit as soft as Dean had imagined and as his tongue entered Castiel’s mouth, he also nipped the chapped lip underneath his teeth gently. Castiel made a deep noise in the back of his throat and his hands came up to tangle in Dean’s spiky hair, tugging and forcing Dean to emit a noise of pleasure.

With hot lightning arcing through him, Dean began to force Castiel back towards the bed, not breaking the kiss for even a moment. He awkwardly kicked his shoes off as he went, Castiel doing the same when he caught on, and the two of them paused only briefly to bend down and pull their socks off. The minute their feet were bare, Castiel gripped Dean’s shoulders, pulled him back up and slammed his lips against Dean’s, kissing as hard as he could. Dean let out an involuntary groan. This was ten times better than he’d ever fantasised!

“C’mon, Cas,” he mumbled, tugging at Castiel’s trench coat. “Get this damn thing off, will ya?”

Castiel willingly raised his arms and let Dean strip him of his coat and suit jacket and then Dean gave him a sharp push. Castiel fell back onto the bed with a quiet, “Oomph!” Dean was then on top of him, kissing and nipping at his lips.

“You sure you wanna do this, Cas?” Dean said.

“If I did not…then I would…tell you,” Castiel forced out, letting out a loud moan when Dean ground his hips down. “Please, Dean…I want to – I want –”

“Yes?” Dean murmured teasingly, rolling his hips down again and relishing in the beautiful sensation it left him with. Castiel whimpered, throwing his head back. “What do you want, Cas?”

“I want – I want to have sex with you,” Castiel gasped. “Please, Dean…”

That was good enough for Dean. His fingers shook as he undid the blue tie and then he scrabbled at Castiel’s shirt buttons, deftly undoing them to expose a tanned chest, and he nearly let out a triumphant cry at the beautiful sight before him that had previously only featured in his dreams. Castiel raised his arms and torso to let Dean pull the white shirt off and then his shaky hands fumbled to tug Dean’s jacket off and undo the buttons of his plaid shirt. Dean chuckled at the difficulty Castiel was having, finally deciding to put him out of his misery and help out. Once his shirts were off and his torso was exposed, he leaned down so that their bare chests were touching (and, consequently, their crotches) and began to kiss Castiel even harder.

Dean was determined to make this the best experience of Castiel’s life. So rather than going hot and rough and fast like he wanted, he forced himself to slow down and focus on mapping out every bit of Castiel’s mouth with his tongue. Once he had finished that, he began to kiss the side of Castiel’s mouth and then trailed kisses down Castiel’s jaw and throat, the angel letting out groans and pants all the while. Finding Castiel’s pulse point, Dean latched on to that spot on his throat and began to kiss and suckle and gently nip, ensuring that he left a mark for the whole world to see that Castiel was his. After all, the angel had given him that handprint – it was only polite that Dean return the favour.

“Tell me if there’s anything you don’t like, Cas,” Dean said, kissing down Castiel’s chest. “Or if it hurts. Or if there’s something you really love. I’m gonna take my time with you, angel boy…gonna make you fall apart…and you’re gonna love it ‘cause it’s me doing it…”

Dean’s mouth closed around Castiel’s left nipple and the angel stiffened, a small groan escaping his lips. He sighed softly when Dean began to kiss and suckle on the small nub but when Dean took it between his teeth and gently pulled, he let out a strangled gasp and scrabbled at the sheets beneath him for something to hold. Dean grinned. Bingo.

“You like that, do you?” he said.

“V-Very much so, Dean,” Castiel panted, mewing when Dean chewed softly again. “I -seem to be – to be very sensitive – yes – please – please continue with that –”

Smirking, Dean toyed with the nipple for a little while longer before paying attention to the neglected right one. When he bit a little harder and rolled it between his teeth, Castiel whined and his fingernails dug into Dean’s back, which only turned Dean on even more. God, was this really happening? Was he really having making Cas come undone underneath him? Or was it just another dream?

When his nipple adventures had come to an end, Dean began to kiss down Castiel’s stomach, which was sparsely covered with black hair, and he stopped briefly to unbuckle Castiel’s belt and undo his dark slacks, ignoring the angel’s unhappy whine at the loss of contact.

“C’mon, Cas,” Dean coaxed. “Get these things off…”

Castiel raised his hips off the bed so that Dean could remove the offending pants and boxers and Dean froze, staring at Castiel’s erect length just poking up. If this was a dream then he wanted to wake up now, before it got too good and he got carried away, because this was the best fucking dream he’d had in a _long_ time.

“What are you waiting for, Dean?” Castiel demanded. “Are you having second thoughts?”

“No! God, no!” Dean said.

“Good.” With one motion, Castiel looped his legs around Dean and swung, so that Dean was now lying underneath him. Castiel’s face was red and flushed, his hair was all over the place and his blue eyes were glinting madly. “Then what is the matter, Dean?”

Dean took a moment to clear the haze of arousal that had descended at Castiel taking charge.

“I just – God, I never thought I’d be getting to do this!” he said. Castiel’s mouth quirked up in amusement.

“I would prefer it if you did not utter my Father’s name while we perform intercourse, Dean,” he said, running a hand down Dean’s chest. After a moment, he lowered his head to suck and chew on one of Dean’s nipples and Dean hissed.

“Fuck…yes, Cas…God, yes…”

Castiel raised his eyebrows but didn’t say anything, instead choosing to continue to nibble on Dean’s nipple. Dean rolled his pelvis up, feeling sparks once again at the friction, and Castiel groaned.

“Oh…John, yes…”

Dean blinked and stared at Castiel, their current activity forgotten.

“Now you know how I feel whenever you say my Father’s name,” Castiel said smugly.

“Point,” Dean admitted. “Fine. I’ll try not to say it. Now can you get back to what you were doing?”

Castiel smiled but, instead of playing with Dean’s nipples again, he began to unzip Dean’s jeans. His insides dancing in anticipation, Dean eagerly raised his hips to let Castiel pull down his jeans and underwear, the cool air on his erect dick making him shiver involuntarily.  Before he knew what he was doing, he had grabbed Castiel’s shoulders and flipped him over so that he was straddling the angel. Their cocks slotted together very nicely and Dean let out a soft sigh at the sensation. Just because he liked being bossed around in bed didn’t mean that he didn’t also enjoy bossing his partner around.

“You’re gonna have the best time, Cas,” he murmured, licking his hand. He wrapped his hand around Castiel’s dick and the angel let out a cry, clenching his fists in the sheets underneath him. “I’m gonna make this awesome…gonna show you a good time, Cas…way better than that Chastity chick…gonna take care of you, Cas…”

“Please,” Castiel whimpered. Dean slowly dragged his hand up Castiel’s length, the angel quivering as he did so. Dean’s strokes were slow at first but then they increased in speed, until Castiel was moaning and writhing underneath him. At this point, Dean let go of Castiel’s dick and eyed it for a moment before bending down and wrapping his lips around it.

“Dean…” Castiel choked. “Dean…please…”

Dean smirked, swirling his tongue around the head of Castiel’s cock, and Castiel moaned loudly and whipped his head. Dean set up a steady pace of sucking and bobbing and swirling his tongue – not taking Castiel’s dick in all the way and deep-throating because he personally hated doing that, even if this _was_ Castiel – and when he also began to cup and play with Castiel’s balls, the angel started to lose it.

“Dean,” he moaned. “Dean – I think – I think I’m going to –”

Oh, so Castiel was going to come, was he? Well, Dean couldn’t have that. He hadn’t finished playing with the angel yet! Dean gave Castiel’s dick one last tongue swirl and then pushed himself up, smirking at Castiel’s disappointed whine.

“Not yet, angel boy,” he said. “I said I was gonna take my time with you…I’m not finished yet.”

“Then allow me…to help…”

Castiel pushed Dean into the bed and then, mirroring his actions, licked his hand and palmed Dean’s throbbing cock. Dean automatically groaned, arching into the touch, and Castiel gave him a pleased smile before beginning to stroke.

“I know all about the mechanics of sexual intercourse,” he said, his pace increasing. Dean’s breathing was erratic and it was all he could do not to start moaning like a common whore. What was it about Castiel? He’d never felt the urge to make such filthy noises like _this_ before! “I am an angel, after all, and we all possess an understanding of intercourse. However, I never understood what was so alluring about it until now…why humans called it ‘heavenly’.”

“Don’t stop,” Dean whined as Castiel began to stroke even faster. God, was that heat already pooling in his abdomen? “Where – where did you…learn to…do it like this?”

Castiel gave him what Dean would have described as a mischievous smile if he didn’t know that Castiel didn’t smile like that.

“From you, of course,” he said. “Just now.” And _fuck_ if that wasn’t the hottest thing that Dean had ever heard! “I’m going to perform oral intercourse now, Dean. If that’s what you want?”

“Fuck, _yes_!” Dean said. Castiel let go of Dean’s dick and bent over it, inspecting it. Dean felt that he had to impart some useful knowledge before the angel began. “Just – wrap your lips over your teeth, Cas. Cover ‘em – yeah, like that. Worst thing when giving someone a blowjob is to bite them. Hurts like a fucking bitch.”

Once Castiel was prepared, he lowered his head and wrapped his mouth around Dean’s dick. Dean’s back immediately arched at the wet sensation and when Castiel’s tongue began to swirl over the head of Dean’s cock, he let out a long, loud whine that he couldn’t even find it in himself to be embarrassed by. He felt Castiel smile and then the angel began to hum contentedly as he blew Dean, the vibrations travelling all throughout Dean and nearly reducing him to a crying mess. How the _fuck_ could this feel so good? What was it about Castiel? Was that sneaky son of a bitch using his grace? Or was he just naturally talented?

The fire pooling in Dean’s stomach was burning hotter and was now starting to spread to his spine. Knowing that his end was coming ( _‘Heh, coming…’_ ), Dean raised a shaky hand to stop Castiel.

“Not yet…” he groaned weakly. “Still got…one more thing…”

Castiel nodded and backed off to let Dean sit up.

“Last thing you gotta learn is good, old-fashioned fucking,” Dean said, fumbling on the ground for his jeans. He pulled a condom and the bottle of lube out of his pocket. “Since you’re the virgin and you’re probably gonna die tomorrow, you get to pick. Top or bottom?”

Castiel frowned at him, so Dean simplified it.

“Your dick in my ass or my dick in your ass?” he said. Castiel nodded in understanding.

“Which feels better?” he asked. Dean shrugged.

“Both,” he said. “You take it up the ass, you get your prostate played with and that’s sensitive as fuck. You give it, it’s just as good in a different way.”

Castiel fell silent, thinking. Dean could feel little Dean beginning to deflate and so he gave himself a few quick strokes to perk his little man up.

“If you don’t mind, I think I would prefer you to penetrate me,” he said. His blunt language made Dean’s already racing heart beat even faster.

“Bottom it is, then. Lie down then, Cas.” He opened the bottle and squirted a little of the fluid onto his fingers, while Castiel obediently lay back on the bed. “Gotta stretch you first. You can’t just take a dick up the ass without proper prep.”

Dean spread Castiel’s legs and lowered a finger to the angel’s entrance, slowly twirling it around. Castiel gasped, his eyes wide, the blue only a thin ring around the pupil. Slowly, Dean guided a finger in and paused, waiting for Castiel to adjust.

“How is it?” he asked. Castiel gave a shaky nod.

“Odd…but pleasant,” he said.

“Good.”  Dean retracted the finger and then pushed it back in, setting up a steady rhythm. When he felt that Castiel was ready, he inserted another finger and smiled when Castiel let out a low whimper and trembled violently. While stretching and scissoring Castiel’s hole, Dean also searched for that one spot he knew would send Castiel over the edge, triumphing only moments later when his fingers found a small knob. The minute he touched it, Castiel let out a keening cry and grabbed Dean’s arm in a death grip.

“Dean!” he wailed. “What – what _was_ that?

Dean wiggled his fingers. Castiel let out a long, keening moan, his back arching.

“That, angel boy, is your prostate,” Dean said. “Feels good, doesn’t it?”

Castiel nodded, his breath stuttering. Dean inserted a third finger but didn’t get to play around for much longer.

“I want you to use your penis now, Dean,” Castiel demanded. Dean blinked and then a slow smile spread across his face.

“Oh, _do_ you?” he said, removing his fingers. Castiel whimpered at the loss of contact. “You want me to fuck you, do you?”

Castiel nodded frantically. Dean quickly ripped open the packet next to him and slipped the condom on over his dick before lubing it up and positioning it at Castiel’s entrance.

“I want you to beg, Cas,” he said. “People don’t get what they want unless they ask. Do you want me to fuck you?”

Castiel nodded again. Dean raised his eyebrows.

“I said, do you want me to fuck you?” he said. He gently rolled his hips so that his cock brushed against Castiel’s entrance.

“Yes…” Castiel choked.

“You didn’t ask very nicely,” Dean said with another roll of his hips.

“Please!” Castiel said.

“Please what?”

“Please can you…fuck me?” The unfamiliar word in Castiel’s mouth nearly sent Dean over the edge then and there.

“Is that what you really want?” Dean purred.

“Yes!” Castiel said. “I want you to fuck me, Dean!”

And that was good enough. Dean guided his tip into Castiel’s entrance and then slowly pushed until he was halfway in. He paused to give Castiel time to adjust and waves of triumph, arousal and pure love washed over him when he saw the angel’s – _his_ angel’s – flushed, sweaty face underneath him, his blue eyes lidded and glazed with lust and his mouth hanging open. _He_ was doing this to Castiel! _He_ was making the angel come undone! It was _him_!

“You okay?” he said quietly.

“Yes!” Castiel croaked. Dean nodded before pushing all the way in, bottoming out and making Castiel moan and clutch at the sheets. But because Dean had a weakness for holding hands during sex, he took Castiel’s hands and clasped their fingers, earning a weak smile from Castiel.

“I’m gonna move now, Cas,” Dean said. “Tell me if it hurts, okay?”

“I’m…an angel…Dean,” Castiel panted. “You can’t…hurt me…”

Dean raised his eyebrows but started a slow, steady rhythm. Castiel clearly wanted more because he whined, “Faster!” and Dean was more than happy to oblige. He pulled Castiel’s legs around his waist and adjusted his angle until his next thrust brought his dick against that familiar knob and Castiel cried out loudly, his back arching off the bed.

“Dean!” he shouted.

“You like that?” Dean grinned. “You want me to do it again?”

“Yes! Please!”

Well, who was he to resist? Dean began to thrust faster and faster, holding back from being completely rough but still not being gentle, and Castiel was slowly reduced to a whimpering, babbling, sweating mess underneath him.

“Oh – yes, Dean – please – ungh – right there – oh – please – yes, that feels so good – keep going, Dean – there – right there!”

Dean was thrilled that his angel was so vocal in bed, especially since his rough, deep voice was just _built_ for sex. He was driving Dean nuts! And boy, was Castiel _tight_! He felt so good around Dean’s cock and Dean could feel his orgasm rapidly approaching.

“Are you close, Cas?” he asked. Castiel nodded frantically.

“Please – oh, yes – don’t stop, Dean – _yes_ – more – please – _more_! Right there – _there_! Harder, Dean, _harder_!”

“So tight, Cas,” Dean groaned over the sound of slapping skin as he continued to thrust. “So good…come for me, Cas…you think you can come for me?”

Castiel nodded. Unable to believe that his fantasies were actually real, Dean continued to fuck Castiel hard and, knowing that the angel was close, decided to help him on his way to his first ever orgasm by taking Castiel’s dick in hand and stroking it.

“Come on, Cas…you can let go now, angel,” Dean groaned, not sure how long he was going to last but wanting Castiel to come first. To Dean’s surprise and immense arousal, Castiel began to babble in a strange, harsh language that he was certain was Enochian, the language of the angels. And _fuck_ , the fact that he’d reduced Castiel to his base instincts and made him forget how to English was fucking _hot_!

“Come for me, Cas,” Dean murmured. With one final thrust and stroke, Castiel’s body seized up and then a white, sticky substance was spurting everywhere as he let out a hoarse, high-pitched cry, his eyes wide and glowing a bright blue-white, and he let go of Dean’s hands and clung to him tightly, as though Dean was his lifeline. His screams began to increase in pitch until every window and breakable object in the house had shattered and thunder crackled and lightning flashed, displaying the shadows of his massive wings. The sight of those magnificent wings and his angel coming undone because of _him_ was enough to send Dean over the edge too. White exploded in his vision as he felt his muscles lock and as he cried out and shuddered through his orgasm, he began to see stars. Then it was over and he was collapsing on top of Castiel, panting and gasping, absolutely speechless.


	4. After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own SPN.
> 
> Here’s the conclusion! Thanks so much, y’all! And thanks to Loki and theairibreathe for your comments last chapter! :)

_After_

For a while, neither Dean nor Castiel could speak. Dean did muster up the energy to roll off Castiel, staring at the ceiling in pure post-orgasmic bliss, but then Castiel weakly reached out and pulled himself into Dean’s arms, his head resting on Dean’s chest. Dean looked down at the sweaty angel in his embrace and, against his will, he smiled tenderly and pressed a kiss to his angel’s messy, damp black hair.

“That was amazing, Dean,” Castiel said breathlessly as Dean began to run a hand up and down his back. He shivered and snuggled further into Dean, who was still spaced out in bliss. Had he really just had sex with Castiel? Had he finally been able to kiss and love him? And did Castiel actually reciprocate his feelings? It was all too much to believe. Dean was having a fucking hard time believing that he wasn’t dreaming.

“Right back at you, Cas,” he chuckled weakly, tightening the hug and resting his cheek on Castiel’s head. “I didn’t know you had that in ya, man.”

Castiel purred proudly.

“So…what now?” Dean continued. “I find you hot, you find me hot. But do you actually like me? Because –” he swallowed, “– because I like you a lot, man. And I know I shouldn’t, because you’re an angel and I’m not s’posed to fall in love with an angel, but I think I kinda did and that’s weird ‘cause I didn’t even like you a few months ago –”

“Dean,” Castiel said, cutting Dean off. “I did tell you that I have loved you for months. I’m willing to be whatever you wish me to be. If you want to be friends then I will be your friend. If you wish for me to be your lover then I will be your lover. And if this –” he ran a hand down Dean’s chest, “– is all you desire then I am more than happy to oblige. Just tell me what you want, Dean.”

Dean stared at Castiel in shock, his eyes stinging slightly. God, what the fuck had he done to deserve such an _angel_? All he’d done was fail to protect Sam and kick-start the Apocalypse! And yet this perfect angel was telling him that he loved him?

“Of – of course I don’t just want this,” he rasped. “Fuck, Cas, I wouldn’t use you for sex. If I wanted that then I’d go out and find some random chick or dude. But – why me? Out of everyone out there, why _me_?”

Castiel looked up at Dean and pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

“Because I was lost the minute I laid a hand on you in Hell,” he said. “I was lost as soon as I wrapped you in my grace to protect you from the horrors of the Pit. You are so _good_ , Dean. You make mistakes and you mess up but you are a good person and you _always_ try to do what’s right. And I tried to stop myself from falling in love with you because I thought that there was never a chance that you would ever reciprocate my feelings.”

“Well, too damn bad,” Dean laughed softly, kissing Castiel. “You’re stuck with me now, angel, whether you like it or not.” He gave Castiel another deep kiss.

“I think I like it a lot,” the angel chuckled when Dean broke the kiss. “We will make this – whatever we have – work. I am determined of that. I will not lose you, not if I can help it. I love you, Dean.”

Dean’s breath hitched and he stared at Castiel in shock. Had he really just said that?

_‘Fuck, Dean! Say something before you look like a dick!’_

“I – I love you too, Cas,” he forced out. He hadn’t ever said that to anybody except for Sam, and John when he was younger! This seemed to be the right thing to say because Castiel smiled contentedly and began to trail a finger down Dean’s chest.

“Thank you for not letting me die a virgin,” he said. Dean let out a snort and pulled his angel even closer, taking the chance to hold Castiel close before they had to summon Raphael and risk their lives. A thought suddenly struck him.

“Hey, Cas? What the hell are we gonna do about the bed?”


End file.
